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The Moment I Realized I Didn't Need to Be Busy Anymore - Kiki Reflects

Kiki Reflects

one woman's struggle to answer her calling

The Moment I Realized I Didn’t Need to Be Busy Anymore

I was working long hours at the Pentagon (including nights and weekends), finishing my Master’s degree, and teaching a couple of yoga classes.  I was an Arbonne Independent Consultant, and pretty active at the time.  The little free time I had was devoted to my boyfriend (now husband) and his son, who lives several hours away in another state.

Whenever someone asked me how I was doing, my response was always, “Busy.”  My friends stopped inviting me out because I was almost always too busy to go.  I stopped traveling to visit family (except for my future stepson) because I no longer had the time.  I didn’t read books for fun because it seemed as though I was always behind in reading for school.  I felt as though I had no control over my life or my time.  The most I could concentrate on was what my very next thing or assignment was.

My now-husband told me I was “overbooking” myself.  Overbooking — this was a concept I had never considered before.

It was shortly after that conversation that I came across this article by Joshua Becker called A Helpful Guide to Becoming Unbusy.  At first, becoming “unbusy” seemed like a luxury I couldn’t afford.  Surely, this article didn’t apply to someone who was finishing their degree?!

Man, did unbusy sound wonderful though!  As I looked around at my life, at everything that was going on, the concept started to sink in.  I realized my husband and Mr. Becker were right.

It was that moment I knew I needed change.  I decided to devote the next year to becoming unbusy.  I stripped away the elements of my life that caused the most stress.  First was when I transferred to a less hectic position outside of the Pentagon.  Next, I put the Arbonne consulting on an indefinite pause.  That helped a lot.

Then, on Christmas day in 2013, my then-boyfriend proposed.  Yay!!  Now, I really had to prioritize!  I knew planning on upcoming wedding was going to keep me busy, but not having the time I wanted to devote to it would be worse.  I made the difficult decision to stop teaching yoga for a while.

In early Spring 2014, I finally finished my Master’s degree.  Now that I had additional free time, I was able to devote it to my fiancee (at the time), his son, and planning our wedding together.  Although I wasn’t quite unbusy yet, I felt a lot better.  I no longer felt as though I was scrambling.  I had rearranged my priorities with the things I wanted most at the top.

My husband and I were married in late 2014, with my 11-year-old stepson as our Best Man.  In the months that followed, we were able to enjoy ourselves and live with much less stress.

For the first time in years, I’m able to look around my life and decide where I want it to go. From here, we have made several huge life changes, including paying off our debt.

Now, I am slowly starting add more things I enjoy back into my life.  I’m reading for fun, (Hello, 50 Shades!), teaching yoga, and traveling again.  As I do, I’m trying to shape my life into what I want it look, instead of allowing my mismanaged priorities to shape me.  Life is too short to spend it shuffling from one thing to the next without enjoying yourself.


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